Tuesday, November 8, 2011

My Hotel Room Smells Like Vomit

For the first time ever I decided to load up my brood and drive them the 10+ hours to my mother's house in Georgia. I've made the trip in 9.5 hours by myself but with my chitlins in tow, it took 12. No biggie. They were really good in the car so it didn't feel like that long at all. They never bitched and moaned about getting out of the car or screamed for different music. River did knock her DVD cord out a few times so I had to stop to fix that.

We spent a few days with momma and then I drove up to Nashville to visit with my father and his wife, see some friends and get a really good haircut. It was the first time daddy had met my kids so that was nice. Owen spent the whole visit asking what kind of food they have. I swear his next meal is always on his mind.

Since it's a bit of a drive I decided to get a hotel room just outside of Nashville. The haircut is tomorrow but today we left Georgia around 7ish and drove to Tennessee. We visited a friend, drove by the house I grew up in, went to Centennial Park to see the Parthenon, visited my Grandparent's graves and even hit a Confederate Cemetery on the way up just for shits and giggles where I got to hear a recorded speech about how the Civil War was not about slavery, but states rights and the distortion of the meaning of the Confederate flag, ummm, ok.

I've always loved cemeteries but only stopped here because it was right off the Interstate and River had kicked out the power cord to the DVD player again. I'm not poking fun at the cemetery or the men buried there but I could not possibly disagree with anything this guy said anymore than I do. That aside, it's moving to see headstones that are marked only "Unknown Soldier." It must stink to never know.

When we rolled into the hotel both kids were asleep and it was only 4:30. Time wise, we are totally lost. We live in Eastern time, drove to Central time and we fell back on Sunday. I'm so fucking confused that as I sit here I can see three clocks and they have three different times. I have no idea what time it is.

When we came into our hotel room Owen immediately set up his Chuggington tracks on the floor and River got out her bag of Strawberry Shortcake dolls. All was good. There was some fussing when Owen kept laying Strawberry on his train tracks and running her over but I put an end to it and all was right with the world.

I noticed that River was acting sluggish. She was clearly exhausted but it was so early that I felt like I couldn't let her go to sleep. She crawled under the covers, put her head on a pillow and pulled the covers up to her neck and with a smile announced "I'm going to sleep." I thought she was joking until I looked over and her eyes were closed. She can't go to sleep at 4:30ish or she'll wake up in the middle of the night. So, because it was so early (either 4:30 or 5:30) I plucked River out of bed, dressed her, put her in the stroller and we walked over to the shopping center across the street. They have a Target and I was on the hunt for the Breaking Dawn Part I soundtrack that came out today! We passed a little shop where I bought a pink (yes, pink) dress for River with matching bloomers. They were having a 60% off sale so I bought it. She doesn't have much from Nashville and I figure this was better than a big ass ugly orange sweatshirt she'll never wear. Go Team!!! But we just don't do orange.

So we were in Target when I asked the kids if they were hungry. River said lightly "Yes momma." This should have been a tip off for me that something was up. She'd not once tried to get out of her stroller and she wasn't forceful about dinner. That's not my River but I knew she was tired so I let it go. I found a small train for Owen and looked at Strawberry Shortcake dolls for River. They didn't have anything that she didn't already own so I didn't get her anything. She didn't complain. That was curious.

I walked through Target pushing my sleepy baby while my big boy ran along side me checking out all the toys and marveled on how great the trip had been so far and how much fun I was having with them. The trip had been so easy and I was loving spending time alone in the hotel for the night with them. We were really just having a good time. Those are thoughts you should just push away because no good can come from them. They're only something you remember with a laugh after everything has gone to shit.

I found the Water for Elephants DVD/Blu-Ray/Digital Copy I'd been looking for but they only had the regular Breaking Dawn Part I soundtrack instead of the Deluxe Edition so I didn't buy it. I was bummed because I'd been looking forward to listening to it but I'd rather wait. On the way out, I asked the kids if they wanted some milk from Starbucks. I got them the milk, opened them and handed them off. River sipped hers lightly and I went to the Target food area to get them some mac & cheese and apples for dinner. I picked up the apples and looked away for a second and that's when I heard it. The sound of projectile vomit. By the time I turned back to look at her it was over. It's like seeing the coverage of a natural disaster on TV and thinking to yourself, "I just can't imagine how that happened." I immediately felt terrible for pushing her to stay awake. I don't think I've ever had to do that but it had just made sense.

She had whistled beef all the way over to my cloth Bannanarama shoes. I think that's the farthest either of my kids has ever thrown up. I mean she didn't clear herself by any means because she got the worst smelling puke all down her denim jacket and white knit dress, which is one of my favorite things of hers. I left the apples on the counter and grabbed my Starbucks napkins to catch the stragglers that were coming out if her mouth. She was so tired that it didn't even phase her but it was horribly vile.

I don't think she's getting anything and I don't think she's sick. I just think her clock is off, she's been eating mostly crap and she was in the car for most of the day. Tomorrow, I will make sure she eats better. We might even stay in the hotel as late as we can so she can get some sleep. I'm thinking of taking the kids to get a croissant in the morning and maybe some eggs. I think she'd do better with something decent on her stomach. I mean a box of milk pushed her over the edge. I'm sure it would have been the same if I'd given her water. It was just her breaking point.

So, instead of spending the night in a big comfy bed by myself like I'd planned, I am sleeping next to my four year old while my tiny 26 pound two year old is wrapped up by herself, sleeping it off. Instead of watching my baby play with her Strawberry Shortcake dolls, I got to clean her vomit soaked clothes with a bar of cheap hotel soap in the sink with water that never got hot enough. Although I've done a really good job of cleaning, my hotel room smells like vomit. I have no way of washing her clothes properly until I get back to Momma's house so I'm sure the van will smell like roses on the trip tomorrow. I guess I should just be happy that she missed her Timberlands.

Even with all that, there's an upside. River is incredibly gentle, as is Owen when they are not feeling well. I couldn't even do that when I was in high school. Hell, I'm still not sure I could do that. If I throw up it ruins my whole day. My kids just shake it off. Also, Owen is being hella sweet tonight. He's been just this side of crazy for the last few days but tonight he's being very quiet while River sleeps and occasionally touches my face with his hands, pulls me to him and gives me a sweet kiss on the lips. Such an angel.

Good times.

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