Friday, February 18, 2011

Shit Kickers

I've made a life out of colouring outside of the lines. Sometimes I do it just to piss people off, I can't deny that but usually I don't need to give it much thought. Odd things just come to me naturally. However, I am a creature of habit. I like what is familiar. You could say that I am not a friend of change. However, some things are certain. I floss daily. I always wear the same coloured undies everyday, I generally eat the same thing every time I go to a restaurant and I haven't worn a shoe that wasn't black in over 20 years, until today.

I'm not sure what came over me. I was at the mall with a friend for lunch and I decided to stop in a shoe store for a few minutes. I knew this store had some groovy stuff because I'd been there before. They sell Chucks for kids and neat off the wall stuff that you don't usually see for kids. I was looking for myself but I'm more apt to shop in your store if I think your store has balls. Not all stores do but not everyone wants their kids to wear Stride Rite forever.

Anyhoo, I've totally fallen in love with my Uggs. I'm not even sure how it happened. Such a pretentious little black boot but I have lived in them since the weather turned. So much so that I've tried not to wear them all week and have relied on my Chucks because I felt like I needed the distance. I didn't want to wake up to warm weather one day and feel out of sorts because I couldn't wear my usual chosen footwear. They've definitely taken a shit all over my other shoes. So that is why I was kinda on the hunt for a new boot, if only to give myself a choice. I was sure when I brought this up with myself weeks ago that I'd buy another (different) black boot because that's what I do. I wear black shoes. I was wearing my black Bananarama shoes today and I love those damn things too. Note to self: Buy another pair of Bananarama shoes.

Since boot season is almost over, I figured it best to look now because boots will be on sale. I was right. There were tons of boots in this store! Granted, most of them were whore boots and I swear some of them were left over from the 1984 Kiss tour. That isn't just an arbitrary statement. While I didn't go see Kiss that year (or ever actually) I remember this asshole in shop class smart mouthing me about Duran Duran and how Kiss was so much better. He went to see Kiss on that tour and said they were awesome. Although I remember thinking a part of him died because it was their first tour with out their makeup, which I'm sure what frightening. Tell me this doesn't scare the ever living shit out of you:

Also, that kids name was Link. Link, I shit you not. While I know my kids name is River so I have no room to judge, I will anyway. River conjures up beautiful strong, blue waters. What does Link bring to mind? A gnawed on baby toy or a rusty piece of broken metal? That's an odd name. I'm just sayin....

Nestled in between the "I'll blow you for $5" boots and the "I'm a nun in my spare time" boots, were some awesome boots! Most of them were black and I'll be honest, I tried on a black pair first but they didn't have my size so I moved on. It's pretty tough to find my size. I wear an 11 and if they even carry my size, most stores only get one or two pairs so I'm generally screwed. However I found an 11 in a boot that I would not normally buy. I bought a brown boot...duh, duh duuuhhhhh.......

My husband hates them!!!!

I must say that while I love these boots I'm not sure if it's because they're awesome or because they're the E.T. of boots, so ugly, they're cute. No idea but they are warm as shit! Also, if I don't get much use out of them, I can wear them to that fucking Renaissance Festival my husband drags me to every year. I'm sure these go with the Star Trek logo, right?

I'm not a complete traitor. I WILL NOT buy a brown purse to go with these boots. I will always wear black with them. Just keepin it real........


  1. I LOVE them! I have a pair of Brown Sketchers that are knit, slouch, kinda Ugg-like that I absolutely love! I still think their pretty ugly but somehow they work and they're so comfy. But I usually chose comfort over anything else. Anyway, I'm a new follower from Weekend Blog Hop.
    And I totally love your blog!


  2. Ok so I hear you about shoping for shoes and size, I am right there with you and size 11. Those boots are so cute. Great find, I am jealous.