Friday, February 11, 2011

Milk is a Weapon

I can't tell you how long I have been trying to get River to drink from a straw. I think I started at 6 months, just like with Owen and she could just never get the hang of it. I would pull it out occasionally and push some milk into her mouth and see if she'd figure it out and drink it herself but she just kept chewing on the straw and tipping the milk up like a regular sippy cup, pouring milk down her neck. So, I'd put it away for a while and bring it out again but she just didn't seem interested.

Today while we were at Target buying a Birthday gift for a party this weekend River started moaning about wanting milk. I didn't have a cup for her so I decided to buy that damn organic vanilla milk they sell at Starbucks. I'm not into "organic" because I don't trust the sales girl to give me correct change, I'm supposed to trust that everyone at the farm did what they were supposed to to make this shit organic? I'm just not that naive. I remember the "organic" veggies they were selling at Whole Foods from China. Hello? CHINA! I can't take anything "certified organic" seriously if it is from China unless "organic" in Chinese means "swimming in lead paint."

Anyhoo, so I get her the "organic" milk because it's all they had and I wanted her to stop moaning for milk. I put the straw in her mouth, push some in for her and she just started drinking it! I gave her a little while we were paying and I was so excited that I said "River, you're drinking from a straw!" She gets excited as well, holds the milk up and squeezes her hands together, shooting milk directly into my face from about 2 feet away.

The only thing worse than having the "organic" milk argument with yourself in Target, is standing in Target with a face full of "organic" milk.

Only my kid.


  1. Hey I'm a new follower from the blog hop! Hope you follow back =) Love your blog, look forward to catching up on older posts!

  2. Very funny blog. I also love the pic of "the stink eye". We use that term all the Following from Sweet & Simple Saturday.

    My Wonderfully Dysfunctional Blog

  3. Hello! I'm a new follower from the weekend hop.
    Tweeting all your good stuff to my 16,000!
    Freebies 4 Moms

  4. You say anyhoo as much as I post. Found you on a blog hop. Hope you can hope over to my blog and follow me too. Have a great Saturday!

  5. I remember my parents not wanting me to have juice boxes for that very reason! lol

    Stopping by from Spicy Blog Hop - new gfc follower :)

    Tales From the Nursery

  6. Hi.
    I'm stopping by to follow and to say hello.
    Have a great rest of your weekend!

  7. This is too funny. I can always count on you to give me a good laugh. Thanks again.