Saturday, November 6, 2010

I'm Never Drinking Again

This is now my mortal enemy. We were best buds not two weeks ago at the Johnny Flynn show but after a day spent in bed or wrapped around the toilet, we're finished. And in case you're wondering, throwing up apple cider fucking sucks!

I went out last night with my girlfriend and her husband and I hadn't planned to drink that much. I mean I was drinking but I had no plans to get hammered. Five Strongbows later and I was a walking train wreck. 5% alcohol kicked my ass. These things are pints and should come with a label that says "Drinking me is like drinking 2 beers." They could put it right under the "Don't drink this if you're pregnant, moron!" Weirdest thing though, all I've been able to drink today is milk. Water and Ginger Ale just makes me feel ill. I took some Tums and almost threw up from that. I had to wash it down with milk so I couldn't taste it. Weird.

I'm hurting. I have a bruise on my leg and forehead and have no idea how they got there. I lost my glasses and didn't find them until dinner time and I left my cell phone in my friends car. Ugggg.....I feel like someone beat the shit out of me.

Next time, I'm the designated driver. I think I had fun though, from what I remember. I'm sure Angie will fill me in on my jackassery later. My best memory is of some strange guy I was talking to and in the middle of the conversation he looks down, grabs my hand and holds it up. "Hey, no ring!" I had to tell him I don't wear my rings when I drink. I mean I lost my glasses, If I'd worn my rings I'm sure they'd be on the floor of one of the bars we went to in Annapolis. I have no idea of any of the names of those places so I'd never find them. He seemed bummed. It was the accent. It's almost always the accent. There's always a story.


  1. LMAO - Mystery bruises is what we used to call them. Just glad you found your glasses and cell phone. I have had friends loose cars before. Of course if you can't find it, you sure as hell don't need to drive it. Have a great and sober night with lots of water :)

  2. Following you from Follow Me Back Tuesdays! Your blog is so cute! Please follow me back @

    XoXoXo, Nicole Mariana

  3. Now I am really pissed i missed that! -k