Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Pour Your Heart Out Wednesday ~ Things I Want My Kids To Know About Me ~ PYHOW
I want my kids to know how much I adore and respect them and that being able to stay at home with them is a luxury that I don't take for granted. However I also want them to know that I am more than just their mother. I was a person before I had them and I am a person now who has a full life that I adore. The best gift I've given myself over the last year is remembering that it's OK to do things that just I love. Having fun being ME is OK. Having things that are my own and that I don't have to share is brilliant! I seem to always find a way to work my babies into most things I'm doing but on my own terms and not because I feel guilty. The guilt train stops here.
I just want my kids to know who I am. I'm more than the person who changes their diapers all day and feeds them their lunches. I set up train tables and search for Percy and Thomas when they are lost and get sippy cups of milk when it's demanded. I stock the house with on sale bulk diapers and buy sensitive wipes for butts as well as faces. I change wet Lightening McQueen big boy underpants and clean bananas from in between tiny fingers. I tie up mounds of blond hair in pink clips and brush out more hair than should be allowed on two small children. I only think about kicking my dog while sweeping up a wealth of dog hair and I take them to the pool while I burn in the sun. I've memorised every DVD they own before they do and I have seen The Wiggles live more than I've seen U2.
I think it's easy to become a shell of yourself when you have children and it takes some time (in my case, over three years) to realize that I'm a person too and I need to be more than someones Momma. I don't want my kids to think that I ceased to exist because I had them. If they think that's normal, they'll do the same when they have kids and I don't want that for them.
So here are some truths about Momma. They aren't all pretty and they don't all paint me in the best light but they're all honest. You'll find that honesty is nice and can be a rarity, but not in this house.
This is Momma....
I like black. Not because it makes me look thinner because it doesn't. I like black because it's easy and it goes with everything.
I think my kids are cuter than most other children and I don't feel bad saying that. You were cut from my womb. It's not like I molded your faces.
Happy, cheery, upbeat people annoy me, because it isn't real. Unless they're on Prozac, but still...
I love driving a mini van. I bought the safest thing for my children that we could afford. No vanity was involved. I feel good about that.
I love when people don't take shit from me. It's refreshing.
I write and blog daily. It's my ME time. I make no apologies for it. It's part of making me a priority.
I was petrified of Owen when I had him. I had no idea what to do. I cried almost all day when daddy went back to work and left us alone.
I'm almost certain that I would die without my camera and laptop. How I functioned before is a mystery.
I don't like most things but am super obsessive about what I do love.
I wish my extended family got along better.
I don't like automatic bill paying. That's putting too much faith in people I don't know.
A deep crimson red is my favorite colour.
I like to sing to my babies when no one else is around. That's why Owen knows so many good songs.
I've punched someone in the face before. In my defense she started it. Well, they both did.
I named my son after a dog. In my defense, she was a VERY, VERY good dog.
I like people with the balls to be honest.
At almost 40, I'm better than I've ever been.
I never skip anything because I feel fat. I'm no thinner sitting at home on my couch bitching and moaning about it.
I worry about my son because he is so gentle and kind.
I once dated a complete moron for ten years. Don't do that!
I once got suspended from school and when the principal called my house I pretended I was my mother. Hi Momma!
I hold my head up high and act like I own the room I'm in, even if I feel like an idiot.
I like to paint my toenails black.
I hate crib bumpers. I think they're death traps.
I once outran the police, on foot. Never do that!
I once ran from the police in my mother's car. Go Nova!
I remember how to dream and do it often.
If I didn't have children I'd be in Georgia (only miles from my mother's house) right now watching Robert Pattinson film Water for Elephants and I don't care who knows it!
Being dyslexic annoys me.
I use to have a cat named Peyote.
I could eat raspberry Jell-o every day.
I suck at math and it hinders me daily.
Momma isn't perfect. Sometimes I use bad words. This is OK when you pay your own rent.
I floss everyday. Unlike most people, I'm telling the truth.
I HATE anything that taste like cherries.
When I'm annoyed I like to be alone. Nothing rejuvenates me faster than not hearing someone else's mouth.
Music inspires me more than anything else.
I'm tickled pink at the thought that my daughter might have my moxy.
I was a terrible student. I want more for you.
As I sit here, there are two Edward Cullen figurines eyeballing me. It makes me giggle.
I like to make things up.
I don't think I'm perfect but man do I kick ass!
This post reminds me of a song that I played at my wedding reception. My step father and I actually danced to it for the father daughter dance. I'm not a big Faith Hill fan but then she didn't write this. I think it's a beautiful song that reminds me to keep in touch with my inner 5 year old, like I needed help.