Monday, July 26, 2010

World's Shittiest Parent

I just did the worst thing that I have ever done as a parent.

I had a very productive morning. I got up before the kids and took a shower. Then I got their breakfast ready before I got them out of bed. I dressed River in something really cute to celebrate "Girlie Girl Monday." While they ate I cleaned their rooms so I could vacuum after nap time and after they finished eating I loaded them into the van to get Owen to school on time. Lately I'd been rolling in right at 9 AM and I hate being "that mom" so I made a point to leave early today. I was pleased that we were the first ones there.

I didn't have anything special planned for "Girlie Girl Monday," but River dressed the part anyway. Cute as hell! We headed to the market because the kids were out of fruit. After that I drove to a consignment shop in Annapolis to help get past me being in mourning for my favorite consignment shop that closed it's doors on Saturday. I was able to find a few little Gap tops for River and really cheap.

We got back to get Owen from school just in time. He seemed to have had fun at school but the only thing I could get out of him was "juice." He feels like he's getting away with something because I don't give him juice at home. Not that he needed to tell me. Kinda hard to miss the red mustache.

When we got home I made the kids lunch and even let Owen eat his on the couch while he watched Thomas. I cleaned out River's drawers setting aside everything that she'd outgrown for a couple of upcoming consignment sale. I then put away the loads of kids clothes I'd folded. I really got a lot done while they had their lunch. Somewhere during this time, my husband came home because the air conditioning was broken at work. He worked in the basement while I finished putting the clothes away.

River was sleepy so I easily put her down for her nap and then went to get Owen. I asked him if he needed to potty first and he said he did so I set him on the toilet and left him there to pee on his own because that's the only way he'll do it. I thawed some things out for lunch and put away the towels before I put another load of laundry in and folded the remaining clothes from the drier. I also separated all of the clothes that still needed to be washed and sent an email to friends who are having babies to see if they need any of my tons of burp cloths or receiving blankets that I dug out of River's drawers.

After I completed these many tasks I sat down at my computer like I do whenever I have a free minute to get some writing done. I probably sat there for 35-40 minutes until my husband came upstairs to get something to drink and he asked me why Owen's door was open. My first thought was that I forgot to shut it when I put him down. I couldn't imagine what he wanted me to see when he came running out telling me to come and see what Owen was doing. I went into Owen's room and I heard him whimpering but I couldn't find him. My husband pointed to the bathroom where I looked and found Owen sitting on the potty, after peeing. My husband was happy because he thought Owen got up by himself and went to go potty. What he didn't know was that Owen didn't do that. He was still sitting on the damn potty from before nap time! HE'D BEEN ON THE DAMN POTTY WITHOUT SAYING A WORD FOR WELL OVER HALF A FRIGGEN HOUR!

Seriously, worst thing I've ever done as a parent. How could I have forgotten he was in there? You should have seen the little red ring around his sweet little butt. I can't believe he didn't complain or at least yell for a cookie after he peed. Needless to say he's skipping nap time and playing with his train table while we watch Star and Nina lead us into Thomas the Tank Engine. I have a feeling I'll be paying for this for a while.


  1. Oh don't be so hard on yourself. I have forgotten mine in timeout before to find them asleep. Or really upset they were still in there. It's an honest mistake.

  2. Wow, all I could think while reading everything you were doing was what a great mom you are. I think it's an easy mistake to make especially since Owen didn't say anything.

  3. This will be a good story to look back on and laugh about. I can't believe Owen stayed on the potty that long, mine would be yelling or chasing me around with his pants around his ankles.

  4. OMG! I'm sorry because I know how upset you are but I couldn't help but laugh! It's always funny when it's not you!

    When my daughter was only 2 weeks old I had her in the swing (not strapped in cuz who straps in a newborn). I had to get clothes out of the dryer and figured since my 18 month old was sitting on the couch with snacks and tv they would be fine for literally a minute. (now two kids under 2 my brain was fried by this time). so I ran down stairs and wasn't even a minute (I'm strange. I like to time myself to see how fast I can get stuff done) and I came up and screamed and cried because my toddler had pulled my newborn out of the swing and was laying with her on the floor. I have no clue how he got her out, if she hit her head, if she was hurt...she wasn't crying and nothing ever came of it so I'm guessing she was okay. But yea...pretty sure I won this worst parent award! LOL

    BTW! Thanks for stopping by! I'm following you back! LOL