Thursday, June 10, 2010

First Day of Summer!


Today was the first day of summer vacation. As I anticipated, after breakfast, Owen grabbed his backpack and tried to wait for the bus. With a little distraction and telling him we were getting in the car, he forgot about the bus. I had a doctor's appointment because I hurt my finger, my middle finger, my most used finger, so we went in to see what was up. Owen ran around my doctor's office yelling, "Who let the dog's out?" and River threw her sippy cup and it busted open on the floor. Thankfully it was only water but their paper towels reminded me of the toilet paper they have in London which is basically wax paper. I remember sitting on a tinniest toilet in the world right outside the Tower of London and saying to myself, "Seriously? I'm supposed to wipe my ass with this?" I thought the same thing today as I pushed water across the floor with this crappy paper. Is it really that much cheaper? How much does it cost when someone busts their ass on the water I left?

Anyhoo, they sent me across the hall for an x-ray and thankfully a nurse was kind enough to sit in the hall with my kids while they nuked me. I don't think it's broken but there's a big, hard knot forming above my knuckle. The sad thing is that if it is related to the fall, it's old news because I fell UP the stairs at least three months ago, bending my finger back. I've been compensating because it's just easier and I hate whiners. I wouldn't even have gone in if it didn't hurt when I used it because I don't have time for this nonsense. I guess they'll call and let me know. I also get to do some fasting blood work to check on my blood sugars. Taking the kids to LabCorps is always a treat. I shit you not, those people are the most miserable people I've ever met. I think they hire them from Imanass.com.

After the doctor's appointment I met Angie and Sherry at Chick & Play and we let the kids play while we all had lunch. Riddle me this, why is it that my son's feet smell like pure unadulterated ass after they've been in his fake Crocs for less than two hours? It's just vile and made me gag when I took them off. His feet smell like he soaks them in vinegar. I love kissing my kid's feet when they're nice and clean. It makes them laugh because it tickles. Those days are over for Owen! Although not for him cause no matter what state they're in, he grabs them and kisses them and says, "Feet are gross!" Yeah, no shit!

So the kids play, well I might add and towards the end of our lunch the 800 year old woman that is sitting behind me, points to River and says, "What's her name?" OK, random, but I'll bite. I said, "Her name is River." Crusty McOldAge actually rolls her eyes! Who does that shit? What's your name, Bertha McSkankington? Don't roll your eyes at my kid or I'll scoot her closer to you and she'll melonball your eyeballs out with her thumbs. Cause she's MEAN!

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