Sunday, August 16, 2009

Hey leadfoot, get off the gas!

I've heard a lot lately about how aggressive I am. I can't argue this point because it is completely true. It isn't something I'm super proud of or go out of my way to do, it just seems to come naturally. I think one of the worst feelings in the world is when someone gets the best of you, therefor, I don't allow that to happen. It's a sickness really, always having to be right.

My husband told me last week that my driving needs work. He doesn't understand why when someone is an idiot on the road, I feel it's my duty to teach them a lesson. I agree with him 100%. I have made a point since said conversation to try to drive more calmly. I seem to speed even when I'm not in a hurry and have no place to be. I have zero patience and I hate that about myself. I think I've caught myself driving like an asshole four or five times this week for no reason. I get so angry when I drive. I can't figure out what my problem is.
It isn't like I'm only aggressive when I drive. I'm a pretty confrontational person in general. This comes in handy when someone is rude to me or says something nasty about my children, but sometimes I think I leave the house in the morning looking for an argument. Like I'm just waiting for someone to piss me off. It would be one thing if it were always a subconscious thing I'm doing, but it isn't. It makes no sense.
I think I'll start with my driving and maybe that will bleed over into other parts of my life. We'll see. Driving like a normal person is harder than you think when you're first attempting it at 39. Half of me is thinking, "slow down Michelle, you aren't in a hurry" while the other half of me is screaming, "Get that piece of shit out of my way!"
Baby steps.

No comments:

Post a Comment